


Defining justice

by epithalamium



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Asexual Relationship, Blink and you miss it Dimitri/Byleth, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Fluff, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route, M/M, Male My Unit | Byleth, Minor Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2021-01-24 16:57:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21341605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epithalamium/pseuds/epithalamium
Summary: As the Imperial army marched closer to Garreg Mach, the weight that had settled at the back of Caspar's throat slid lower, a steady but unstoppable dive into the pit of his stomach.
Relationships: Caspar von Bergliez/Ashe Duran | Ashe Ubert
Comments: 22
Kudos: 47





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I think their support conversations are really cute so I tried to write fic! I love how they also have unique lines when you make them do group tasks or if you eat meals with them!! 🤗 I love these cat dads! 
> 
> This is an Azure Moon run where Byleth recruited Caspar and Linhardt.

As the Imperial army marched closer to Garreg Mach, the weight that had settled at the back of Caspar's throat slid lower, a steady but unstoppable dive into the pit of his stomach.

Professor Eisner seemed to be taking everything in stride, even joking with Caspar during one of his weekly rounds of the monastery.

'Professor!' Caspar's voice hadn't cracked since he'd started shaving, but that's what it did now. He cleared his throat and tried again. 'What if I meet my father on the battlefield? He's a complete demon when he fights!'

'Don't worry,' said Eisner, the ghost of a smile on his lips. He wasn't easy to read and could give the stone-faced noblemen in the Bergliez court a run for their money. But Eisner knew Caspar wasn't good with subtleties--he just had no time for it--and Eisner was kind enough to voice his thoughts when his emotions weren't showing through. 'I'll make funeral arrangements.'

Caspar laughed. He was going to stand on the other side of the battlefield against his father and would probably never be allowed to go home again, all because Eisner had asked him to join the Blue Lion class. Caspar had wanted to learn more from him, the man who could kill without blinking an eye. The professor who treated all his students with patience and respect.

Except when he was teasing, which he did with the same impassive look on his face.

'I never thought I'd be switching sides like this,' said Caspar.

'You never planned on staying in the shadow of your father, did you?'

Caspar shook his head and Eisner gave him a hearty thump on the back. 

'Good man,' said Eisner. 'I'm counting on you.' 

'Leave it to me!' Caspar struck a heroic pose, waiting for Eisner to leave the training grounds before flopping against a pillar like the effort had exhausted him.

Before Eisner arrived at Garreg Mach to teach, he used to be a mercenary. Caspar had heard all about the Ashen Demon, son of the Blade Breaker, and feared by many for his apparent lack of fear or remorse. Caspar had no idea how true the rumours were--Eisner seemed like a nice enough person, despite his inexpressive face--but fuck, did Caspar wish he had a cool nickname like Eisner did. 

He wondered what it would take for people to dub him a new name. Nothing embarrassing, of course, but as an acknowledgement of his strength. Eisner was only a few years older than Caspar, but he'd had a head start: he'd been working as a mercenary since he was a kid. Out of Caspar's peers, the only person who had achieved anything close to what Eisner had was Blaiddyd, and he got his chops from fighting in the Western rebellion. 

If Caspar wanted to catch up and make a name for himself, he needed to get more experience in battle. That was fine, in fact he looked forward to it. He just wished he didn't have to go against his father in his first major battle. 

Then again, he was fighting on the same side as Eisner and Blaiddyd. Perhaps there was a chance for them to win against the might of Bergliez.

Still. Caspar thought he should look into those funeral arrangements Eisner was talking about. Maybe Seteth would know.

*

'Are you feeling unwell?'

Caspar looked at Ashe, who was sitting next to him in the dining hall. He hadn't noticed Ashe come in, let alone join him at the table.

'Why should I be?' Caspar forced a laugh and tried to avoid meeting Ashe's eyes. He hadn't done anything wrong, but he felt guilty anyway.

'You've only eaten one of your sweet buns,' Ashe pointed out. He raised a hand before Caspar could reply. 'I've already eaten two of mine. That's not your usual pace, is it?'

Caspar laughed again, although it came more naturally this time. He pushed his plate of sweet buns closer to Ashe. 'If you wanted some more you could have asked.'

Ashe tilted his head to one side, like he was considering his choices. He had a surprisingly robust appetite--Caspar had expected him to be more like Linhardt, who had to be pried away from his bed and books to eat. They were both bookish types after all, and Ashe didn't look particularly strong.

'Well then.' Ashe took a bun from Caspar's plate with a nod. 'Are you worried about the Imperial army?' he added, his voice was so low Caspar had to lean close to hear what he said.

'Aren't you?' said Caspar. He sighed. 'No, of course everyone's worried. Sorry.' 

'I'm not from the Empire,' said Ashe. Caspar wondered if there was accusation in his tone, but decided Ashe was just stating a fact. 'But I am Lord Lonato's adopted son.'

Ah. Caspar crossed his arms over his head and leaned back in his seat. He still didn't meet Ashe's eyes. 'We were never close, my father and I. But I never imagined I would end up opposing him.'

'You don't have to fight, surely.'

'Garreg Mach is also my home,' said Caspar. '_You_ didn't have to join the knights who went to take Lonato down.'

He wondered if he'd gone too far. Caspar had only been with the Blue Lions for half a year and perhaps Ashe still considered him an outsider, an acquaintance overstepping his boundaries. Caspar looked sideways at Ashe, to gauge how angry he was. 

Ashe was smiling. 'I didn't, but it was the least I could do. It's not like you to worry about a decision you've already made, Caspar.'

Caspar grinned back. 'You've never met my dad.'

'I sure hope I don't,' said Ashe. 'I've heard of his deeds.'

They ate in companionable silence, Ashe reluctantly sharing his meat skewer with Caspar in exchange for the sweet bun, and Caspar was feeling more like himself again when he asked, 'Do you think we'll win?'

Ashe shook his head. 'We'll have to trust the professor and Prince Dimitri, I think.'

*

Caspar pressed his ankles against Mook's sides, urging the wyvern to swoop down just a bit faster, muttering a prayer he didn't know he remembered to the goddess he wasn't sure he believed in, _anything_ that would let him grab Ashe before Arundel's soldiers finished him off. Caspar yelled, throwing his axe at the armoured knight nearest him--the silver axe still had a bit of use before it broke and Caspar had no other weapons on him, but he needed both his hands to grab Ashe anyway. Ashe might be able to shoot arrows at the enemies before the blood loss got too bad; they wouldn't be completely defenseless. Probably. 

'Thank you,' said Ashe. He looked like he was about to keel over any moment, but he still managed to take a warrior down while being held up by his armpits like wet laundry from a wyvern that wouldn't hold still.

Caspar fell in love a little bit.

Mook wasn't used to bearing more than Caspar's weight and they had to fly higher than usual in order to avoid the battalions marching towards them, but they made it to the gates of the monastery somehow. Linhardt and Mercedes held the fort, close enough to the Archbishop they could jump onto the defensive if they had to, but mostly on the lookout for wounded comrades.

Linhardt took one look at Ashe and threw a healing spell at him without saying anything.

'Took you long enough,' said Caspar, swooping in close so he could drop Ashe next to Mercedes. Linhardt rolled his eyes, but he looked as pale as Ashe himself and was probably only standing up because there was a pillar behind him. 'Thanks, Linhardt.'

'Where's the Archbishop?' said Ashe.

'She left.' Mercedes sounded more distraught than Caspar had ever seen her. He'd thought she was as unflappable as Eisner. 'When Lord Arundel's troops marched in, she left on her own.'

'We didn't notice until later,' said Linhardt.

'There's too much happening,' said Ashe. 'Who knew Edelgard had this many troops surrounding Garreg Mach? And rallying them at such short notice?'

'She must have been preparing for a while.'

Caspar took a look around him; their own troops were holding up as best they could, but they were obviously outnumbered. Blaiddyd was fighting next to Riegan near the monastery walls, but-- 'Where's the professor?'

Before the battle started, Caspar thought the odds of them winning against Adrestia weren't bad. He knew how strong the Empire was--his father formed the backbone of its military prowess after all--but Garreg Mach had the Knights of Seiros and the help of the Officers Academy. And of course they had Eisner, who wielded the sword of the Creator and who had come back from the darkness where time didn't exist.

But when he saw the expression on Blaiddyd's face when they found out Eisner had fallen, Caspar realised they had lost the war.

*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 16 Jan 2021 - Hi, it's me. I started working on a different fic without finishing this one and I got a better grasp of how I wanted to write FE3H since then. (I haven't written high fantasy in a while oops.) Anyway, I knew I have to revise this whole fic before I could continue with it. Thanks to everyone who read the earlier version and said nice things! ☺ I hope I continue to get better!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caspar's life five years after the fall of Garreg Mach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I come back with a chapter that has no physical Ashe in it :"DD But he'll be back once we get the whole thing set up, much like Byleth.

Five years passed. Depending on how Caspar felt and how hungry he was when asked to describe those years, time either flew by like a pegasus knight finishing her kill or stomped stolidly on like a fortress knight protecting her liege. 

He had considered becoming a knight himself. Not that he had much interest in chivalry and honour, but his Blue Lion friends were rather keen on the whole idea of knighthood. Caspar had grown up around the knights who served Bergliez so he was at least familiar with the lifestyle. 

He needed to ally with a noble family from Faerghus--having his Officers Academy connections proved to be useful, but while Fraldarius was perfectly happy to take him on as a squire, Caspar wondered if a stable job was worth the trouble of dealing with the suspicion and distrust. He couldn't blame the people of Faerghus; not only was he Adrestian but he was also from the House of Bergliez. He'd cut ties with his family after the fall of Garreg Mach, but that meant nothing to the ordinary people whose lives the Emperor had gambled with in her quest for her own justice. 

So Caspar decided to join a group of mercenaries instead. He wasn't sure if it was something he wanted to do for the rest of his life, but he did get to travel around, meet all sorts of people, and keep in touch with some of his friends from the Academy. Things could be worse. 

He didn't lack for jobs either: the rising tension between the lords of the Alliance was well known, but there was discord back in Faerghus as well. The debris in the monastery barely had chance to settle down before the Regent demanded Blaiddyd's return to the capital. A perfectly reasonable request that somehow led to the Regent's death. Blaiddyd had been tried and executed for his own uncle's murder, but no one knew what had really transpired. Not even Gautier and Fraldarius, who had both accompanied Blaiddyd back to Fhirdiad. 

'They all but kicked us out of the palace, those swine.' 

After the fall of Garreg Mach, the rest of the Blue Lions had gone back to their homes--at least the ones who had places to call home. Caspar went where his group was needed, but the Duchy of Fraldarius hired men regularly in its campaign against Cornelia's men. In the five years since he'd left the Academy, Caspar had seen more of Fraldarius and Gautier than any of his other Blue Lion friends combined. They usually shared a drink in Fraldarius's chambers before heading out to join the troops. 

'Look,' said Caspar, trying to remember what Eisner had taught him about tact. 'Not to speak ill of the dead--' 

Gautier made a sound Caspar couldn't quite place. 

'He's dead,' said Fraldarius. 'Stop acting like my father.' 

'And I respected the prince as much as the next person,' Caspar went on. 'But he'd been acting strange since we found out Hresvelg was the Flame Emperor. How can you be certain he didn't kill the Regent?' 

Fraldarius snorted. 'He was a boar, but I doubt even he could break out of his heavily guarded quarters and kill someone who wasn't even in the palace.'

'What do you mean?' 

'They'd kept him confined to his rooms with a heavy guard detail. Cornelia pretended it was to keep the prince safe, but they were only trying to keep him inside.' 

Caspar nodded. 'And the Regent?' 

'Rufus was stashed in his holdings in Itha.' Fraldarius sighed and rubbed at his temples with his fingers. 'He was killed there.' 

'All right,' said Caspar. 'I see what you mean.'

'Do you really distrust the prince that much?' said Gautier. There was enough humour in his voice that Caspar knew he wasn't trying to pick a fight. 

'I liked him well enough,' said Caspar. 'But he wasn't all there, was he?' 

Fraldarius laughed. 'Yet you chose to fight under his banner. You fight for what he stood for, even now.' 

'I thought it was fine.' Caspar looked out of the mullioned windows of Fraldarius's room, the thick glass panes lightly frosted and obscuring the view of the courtyard below. 'He had the professor--' 

'And now they're both gone,' said Fraldarius. 'It's up to us to fight the Dukedom in their stead.'

Gautier made a token complaint, but Caspar had seen him in enough battles to know his holdings were going to be left in good hands. The students from the Blue Lion house were more prone to melancholy compared to anyone Caspar had ever met--he reckoned the bleak Faerghus winters played a part as much as the recent tragedy in Duscur--but they were solid and hardworking folk. Caspar respected that. 

And they were doing their best, even without a figurehead to rally around.

*

The Dukedom's forces were easily dispatched from the borders of Fraldarius. Caspar heard Lord Fraldarius talking about the possibility of those invasions being a mere distraction, but Caspar had no idea what they were supposed to be distracted from. Keeping track of the nobles of Faerghus and their allegiances gave him enough of a headache; he wished Eisner was still around to explain what it all meant.

'Will you come back for the Millennium Festival?' said Gautier, on their way back to Gautier's seat. He had invited Caspar to his family's holdings and Caspar agreed readily enough. Gautier wasn't as affluent as Fraldarius and didn't pay as well, but for a good friend, Caspar was willing to work for a couple meals a day and a place to sleep in. 

'We promised, didn't we? Do you think the others remember?' 

'Man, it would be great to see Mercedes again.' Gautier laughed when Caspar rolled his eyes. 'What about that friend of yours--Hevring? Is he coming back?'

Caspar shrugged. 'Haven't spoken to him since I left my family. He went back to Adrestia after the battle in Garreg Mach.' 

'I know Ingrid will come, I've spoken to her just last week,' said Gautier. 'Have you heard from Ashe at all?'

Caspar hadn't thought of Ashe in five years. 'Gaspard's allied with Rowe, isn't it?' 

'Now that you mention it,' Gautier's voice trailed off. 'Last I heard, he'd taken over the upkeep of Castle Gaspard as Lonato's adopted son. You think he's allied with the Dukedom?' 

'I don't know.' There was a faint trace of a whine in Caspar's voice. He wasn't the type of noble who caved at any mention of physical work, but he was too tired and in need of a bath to think about politics. 'Ashe wouldn't, but he has to think of Gaspard too.' 

'Whoah.' Gautier stopped walking and almost got run over by his horse. He was nice enough to walk part of the way next to Caspar, who had to leave Mook with the Knights of Seiros. There was no way a green mercenary could afford a wyvern's upkeep and have enough left to feed himself. 

'If you die and leave Gautier heirless, the whole of Faerghus will be after my neck.' 

'Never.' Gautier laughed. 'Gunpowder's too well trained for that. But Bergliez! You actually remember the codes of chivalry? The professor would have been so proud.'

'I figured that one for myself,' said Caspar. 

'Well,' said Gautier. 'If you ever find yourself near Gaspard--'

'Same to you.'

'Are you kidding?' said Gautier, shaking his head. 'Gaspard and Gautier are on completely opposite ends of Faerghus; my father would kill me if I left the keep that long just to visit a friend.' Gautier cleared his throat, made a humming sound, then cleared his throat again. Caspar was about to ask him if he was all right when he finally said, 'Did you and Ashe have a disagreement?' 

Caspar ran his tongue over his teeth. 'I mean,' he said. 'We don't agree on everything, but we're fine.' 

'Why are you so reluctant about visiting him, then?' 

'It's not that I don't want to. But like you said, he's in Gaspard. I'm an exile from the Empire. That's going to cause some bit of trouble no matter how you spin it, don't you think?' 

'True enough,' said Gautier. 'I always figured you were the impulsive type, but I guess one shouldn't make generalisations--' 

'Was that something Mercedes said?' said Caspar. 

'You wound me.' Gautier laughed and reached out to tousle Caspar's hair but Caspar nipped that idea in the bud by raising an eyebrow and touching the handle of his axe. 'I'll have you know I think only the best of everyone.' 

One of Gautier's knights tried to stifle a laugh, clearly in an effort to appear like she wasn't eavesdropping. Caspar couldn't blame her; she was from Gautier's personal unit and was getting paid to shadow him despite his complaints and numerous attempts to shake them off, she obviously knew him better than most people.

'The professor said you're the sharp one.'

Gautier's eyes widened. 'Did he?' 

'He told me,' said Caspar. 'If I wanted to ally with one of the nobles from the Kingdom, Gautier's a House to consider. I'm not good with tactics, but you're one of the few who can take that into consideration.' 

'Not as well as he could.' Gautier sighed. There were a number of men like him in the Officers Academy; the type Caspar's father would have dismissed as frivolous nobles, trained enough not to trip on the swords hanging from their belts and not much else. But Gautier was from the harsh lands of northern Faerghus and sometimes he lowered his guard enough for it to show.

'I might head for Magdred Way after this campaign,' said Caspar. 

Gautier patted his shoulder. 'Good man.'

*


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caspar arrives at Gaspard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashe is finally here! We can finally move on and forward.

There were many things Caspar liked about Faerghus. He liked how straightforward people were compared to Adrestian society, which relied heavily on implications and context. He even preferred the food, the simple fare that allowed the ingredients to shine. 

But he didn't love the weather. Winter arrived early even in the green fields of Fraldarius, but Gautier and Galatea were miserable places that Caspar reckoned were built primarily on rocks and snow. In comparison, Rowe and its surrounding areas were more like Adrestia--which made sense seeing as how they bordered the Empire to the west. The air was gentler and the lands more forgiving; even the outcroppings that rose over the trees were softened with moss and time. 

In a way, the place was much like Ashe. Caspar didn't consider himself a ruthless person--at least, not in the way Blaiddyd was--but his justice was exact and immediate. In comparison, Ashe was so weighed down with thoughts and considerations Caspar was surprised he managed to do anything at all. 

No, that was unfair. Ashe was kind and forgiving, but he'd fought in enough battles with Caspar for him to know Ashe was a dependable ally who would take swift action if he had to. 

The problem was Ashe deciding _when_ he had to. 

'That's Castle Gaspard over there.' Sean nudged Caspar on the side and pointed at a rocky edifice several miles away. Castle Gaspard looked to be a stone keep typical of most castles in Faerghus; they tended to put a lot more emphasis on sturdiness and fortifications than aesthetics. Caspar had grown up visiting Fort Merceus with his father and, while the castles of Faerghus hadn't achieved the same legendary reputation, Caspar thought it spoke a lot about the Kingdom nobles that they preferred their dwellings to be more fortress than palace. 

'This place is part of your usual route then?' said Caspar, squinting against the setting sun. 

Sean nodded. 'The roads aren't too bad, although it's best not to take any chances--' 

'Works in my favour,' said Caspar, who had journeyed to Gaspard with Sean's group of merchants as a hired knife--or in his case, axe. 

'And Lonato was one of the good ones.' 

He must have been or the villagers wouldn't have died for him and his beliefs. Caspar hadn't been with the Blue Lions at the time so what he knew of the events was second-hand information, but he only needed to look at Ashe in the weeks after Gaspard's rebellion: the dark circles around his eyes and the tight set of his jaw. 

'I guess this is where we part ways,' said Caspar, once Sean and his group had gotten settled in the village inn. Caspar was unsure if he was welcome in Castle Gaspard, but Ashe wasn't the sort who'd turn an old schoolmate out in the streets--even if that schoolmate happened to be from the Empire. Caspar hoped Ashe would at least offer him a place for the night. 

'Shame you can't join us for the rest of the trip.' Sean shook Caspar's hand. 'Thanks for your hard work.' 

'No problem,' said Caspar, who'd been required to do nothing more exciting on the way than help fix a wagon wheel. 'If you need help once you reach Leicester territories, ask around for Leonie Pinelli. You can say Caspar sent you.' 

'Caspar?' said Sean, raising an eyebrow. 

'Just Caspar. She'll know who I am.' Caspar grinned. He knew what Sean was trying to get at--Caspar might have cut ties with his family, but he couldn't help looking like he did and he obviously had the Bergliez face. Unfortunately for Sean, Caspar had spent the better part of five years avoiding such questions and he was getting good at it. 

With implications dodged and farewells said, Caspar left the village for Castle Gaspard.

*

'What's your business here?'

Caspar tried not to lose his temper; attacking the gatekeeper wasn't going to get him inside the castle faster. But part of him wished it did. 'I'm here to see Ashe Duran, I told you.' 

'And who will I say is looking for Ashe?' The gatekeeper was wearing a helmet with a visor, so Caspar couldn't see their face, but he was sure he was being eyed in the same way Sean had looked at him an hour ago. The goddess damn his face. 

'Caspar,' said Caspar. 'I was in Garreg Mach with him.' 

'Are you--' 

'Yes.' Caspar crossed his arms and leaned against the wooden gate. Moments like this made him painfully aware he would never be as intimidating as Dedue or Raphael, but he had to make do with what he had. 'I am. My family took me out of the register five years ago, so I'm just Caspar. I know we both want to spend our night next to a fire and away from this miserable fog, so please.' 

'Wait here.' The gatekeeper opened the gate a crack and slid inside. The process took no more than a few seconds and made Caspar wonder if security really was this tight in Gaspard or if his lone self was somehow viewed as a real threat against a whole keep. 

He heard the gatekeeper shout something from inside. More shouting and a few minutes later, the door finally opened wide enough to admit a man and Caspar expected it was the gatekeeper returning to annoy him some more, but Ashe was standing in front of him instead.

'Caspar?' 

Ashe had grown up. Unlike Fraldarius and Gautier who looked much like they did back in the Academy, Ashe was taller and had filled out a bit--Caspar felt a faint annoyance when Ashe stepped closer and he realised they were about the same height. 

'What are you doing here?' 

Talking came as easily to Caspar as weilding an axe or getting in fights with people, but faced with the worry in Ashe's face he found himself at a loss for words. 

'Never mind that.' Ashe shook his head. 'We can catch up over dinner. Have you had dinner? It's about time for dinner, isn't it?' 

'Is that all you've got to say?' said Caspar. 'The gatekeeper was asking to see proof of my lineage.'

Ashe laughed. 'You've saved my life numerous times; I think we can forgo the formalities.' He waved Caspar inside. 'Welcome to Castle Gaspard.' 

There was a bit of loose thread on the edge of Caspar's sleeve and he pulled at it while he figured out how to say his piece. 'People might talk.' 

'Because we're both eligible young men staying in a castle together?' Ashe tilted his head to one side. 'Are you planning on seducing me, Caspar?' 

Caspar punched him in the arm. 'You know what I'm talking about. I'm trying to be considerate and this is what I get?' 

'The professor didn't tell you about me?' said Ashe, closing the gate behind them. The gatekeeper was standing nearby, probably to make sure Caspar wouldn't try to attack--or seduce--Ashe. 

'Tell me what?' Caspar followed Ashe towards the keep. A handful of people attending to their duties in the bailey looked curiously at Caspar and Ashe as they passed, but they didn't appear hostile and returned Ashe's greetings cheerfully enough. 

'Later,' said Ashe. 'Sorry. I didn't think the professor would reveal private information about his students, but I wondered if you'd noticed.' 

Caspar tried to remember what he knew of Ashe, but none of it seemed relevant to their conversation. 'The professor once saw me wipe my sweat off with Dorothea's small clothes.' 

Ashe turned around so he could frown at Caspar. 'You didn't!' 

'I didn't know what it was,' said Caspar, his voice rising. 'Besides, my point is! The professor was the kind of person who wouldn't say anything if it meant putting his students in an awkward situation, is my point.' 

'You're not wrong,' said Ashe. 'But really, Caspar.' 

Ashe could spend the rest of the night lecturing if Caspar let him. 'What's for dinner? I feel like it's been years since I've had a proper meal.' 

'You sound like Raphael.'

They'd reached the stone keep. Caspar had taken note of the castle defenses: the number of people working there, the blind spots of unlit spaces in the bailey, and the state of the actual building itself. Castle Gaspard was more well maintained than he expected, considering its recent involvement in treasonous scandals. In fact, it was doing quite well despite being run by a young man fresh out of the Officers Academy. 

'If there's anything I can do to help out,' said Caspar. 

'Hm?' Ashe was heading for what Caspar assumed were the kitchens--they'd passed a couple people wearing aprons and carrying food items in baskets, and the smell of roasting meat grew stronger as they went further down the corridor. 'Dinner's ready, but you can help out tomorrow if you want. I'm sure the staff would love to see your meat carving tricks.' 

'No, I meant.' Caspar had started tugging at the loose string on his sleeve again, but he realised he was fidgeting so he dropped that and ran a hand through his hair instead. 'You asked why I was here, right? To be honest, I just wanted to drop by and ask if you're going to the Millennium Festival reunion--' 

'Oh,' said Ashe. Something in his face changed, but Caspar wasn't sure what. 'I almost forgot.'

'But I see there are problems in Castle Gaspard you need help with,' Caspar went on.

Ashe crossed his arms. 'You think so?' 

There was a challenge in Ashe's tone that Caspar chose to ignore. 'What do you say? I can work for food and board. I'll even try not to seduce you.' 

'And deprive the villagers of something to gossip about?' Ashe laughed. 'Well, we're both headed for Garreg Mach in a few moons. And you might keep out of trouble if you stay here.'

Rushing headlong into the fray was exactly what Eisner had warned Caspar against, but he'd come up with an idea while enjoying Gaspard's hearty hospitality. 

Castle Gaspard might be an unknown territory with uncertain political standing and social pitfalls, but Ashe was doing his best to keep the place from falling into ruin. But unlike their noble friends from the north who'd known and supported each other from birth, Ashe didn't have a strong connection with the neighbouring noble houses. Caspar's standing in a war-torn Faerghus might be just as rocky as Gaspard's, but he thought there was no harm in lending Ashe his strength. 

In return, Caspar reckoned Ashe could watch out for him. Ashe already spent most of his time thinking about consequences and ethics, he probably wouldn't mind taking care of Caspar's share of pondering as well. 

'We've got to plan with our strengths and weaknesses in mind, right?' said Caspar, in between bites of his sweet bun. 

'Yes.' Ashe looked like he was about to say something more, but he shook his head and smiled instead. 'You're right. I look forward to working with you, Caspar.' 

'As do I,' said Caspar, raising his mug of ale for a toast.

*


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caspar learns a few things about Ashe's past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh, I replayed the Blue Lions route recently and it turns out Ashe stepped down from his position when House Rowe allied with the Dukedom? But as I have a sieve-like brain and forgot that ever happened, I try to make excuses for my lapses. Sorry, Ashe. :"D

Caspar had considered throwing pebbles at Ashe's windows again, but he was yet to be forgiven about that one broken pane, so he made the effort to run up the tower and knock at Ashe's door instead. 

'Do you have to?' said Ashe. He was rubbing at his face like a cat and looking just as unamused, but he was awake and that was what mattered. 'The sun hasn't even risen yet, Caspar.' 

'Our prey won't wait for us to get out of bed.' Caspar barged inside Ashe's room, ignoring Ashe's token protest, and pulled out clothes from various chests and hangers. 'Marlena made us fish sandwiches for breakfast.’ 

‘I don’t like them,’ said Ashe--another complaint Caspar ignored since he remembered seeing Ashe eat four of them a few days ago. Instead, Caspar helped Ashe put on some clothes and half-dragged him out of the room. 

'I thought the Blue Lion students were hardworking folk,' said Caspar. 

'I'll work hard when I've had enough sleep.' Ashe was yawning and dragging his feet, but he must have been awake enough to grab his gear before they left his room. The sight of Ashe deftly buckling the belt of his quiver around his waist despite having a hard time keeping his eyes open was more endearing than Caspar expected. 

'Are you going out to hunt bears?' 

Ashe's sister, Bridget, was waiting for them at the bottom of the stairs. She stood up as Caspar got closer, handing him a small bundle wrapped in waxed paper. 

'You bet,' said Caspar. 'What's this?' 

'Roasted pheasant,' said Bridget. 'I doubt Marlena packed enough for lunch; I've seen how you both eat.' 

'We can't carry a whole bear back with just the two of us,' said Ashe. He scowled when Caspar elbowed him on the side. 'I'm just saying. It doesn't even taste good.' 

Bridget rolled her eyes. 'I'm sorry my brother is like this--'

'Bridget!' 

'Good hunting, boys.' Bridget gave them a cheery wave before hurrying back to her own room. She preferred to sleep near the kitchens with the servants because that area of the keep was usually kept warm from the oven fires. The servants of Castle Gaspard treated the Durans like they were actual blood relations to the late Lord Lonato, but Ashe and his siblings rarely--if ever--exercised this unexpected power. 

'Did she really wake up at this hour just to see you off?' said Ashe. 

Caspar laughed. 'You know, I thought you were smart,' he said, tucking the bundle Bridget had given him inside his bag along with the rest of their supplies. 

'What do you mean?' Ashe didn't sound particularly bothered. Linhardt would have laughed at the idea of Caspar knowing things he didn't, but Ashe didn't even seem to realise he was one of the smarter students from the Blue Lion house. 

'She woke up at this hour to give us roasted pheasant. I don't particularly love roasted pheasant.' Not that Caspar hated the dish; the berry sauce was the tolerable level of sour for him, but he wouldn't have sought it out either. He reckoned he'd eaten enough meals in Castle Gaspard for Bridget to have noticed that. 

'You don't like sour and spicy things, do you?' Ashe tilted his head to one side. 'Which means you probably wouldn't like Duscur cuisine, but I know the Empire has a lot of strongly flavoured food as well.' 

'Well,' said Caspar. 'I guess there are some things I like about Faerghus.' 

'I can't believe you actually prefer our food. Sylvain would have a fit.' Ashe laughed, and then gave Caspar a thump on the back. 'Come on. Bridget would be livid if she finds out we wasted our time chatting when she woke up before the break of dawn to pack us some food.' 

'Seems like she looks up to you a lot.' Caspar had left the main door open and he could see one of Gaspard's men waiting for them in the bailey--or at least their silhouette, seeing as how the sun wouldn't be up for another half hour. 'Won't your battalion join us for the hunt? We could still bag ourselves a bear.' 

'Not all of them,' said Ashe. 'Not if they can work the fields instead.' He lowered his voice. 'I'm not sure Lord Lonato would have wanted Gaspard to keep serving House Rowe under these circumstances, not after the rebellion left so few of the villagers--' he sighed, 'But I don't think Gaspard could survive resisting the Dukedom either.'

Manpower was already scarce, but Gaspard hadn't been given time to recover when Adrestia declared war and Cornelia staged her coup. 'I don't like it myself, but I don't see what else you could have done.' 

'I could have stepped down from my position.'

'And leave these people to fend for themselves?' said Caspar. 'That doesn't sound like you.' 

Ashe turned away, but not fast enough that Caspar still managed to see his pink cheeks. 'Thank you, Caspar.' 

'Let's go.' Caspar headed out the door, wondering why he felt like he needed to get as far away from Ashe as possible.

*

The deer Caspar had been tracking must have sensed the storm; it was more skittish than usual and eager to outrun its hunters, paying less heed of its surroundings. Caspar almost hit one of Ashe's men with his hunting knife because the deer had gone too close, shying away only before a collision. Shouting his apologies to the poor man, Caspar took chase, not realising how far from the hunting party he'd gotten until he heard the distant crack of thunder.

'Fuck.' Caspar touched the grounding charm that hung from a strip of leather around his neck. Fuck the deer; the nearest building was a shepherd's hut four kilometres away, he wouldn't be able to get there before the storm broke. 

The logical part of his brain told him the hunting party wasn't too far away, that he had spent a moon getting acquainted with the forest of Gaspard and was therefore not in an unfamiliar place, that the charm would definitely work and he was going to be fine--Caspar tried to regulate his breathing. The sky had darkened enough one would think dusk had fallen when it was just past noon, the trees overhead blocking whatever sunlight remained but not the flash of lightning that tore across the sky and, for a moment, brought everything in sharp relief. 

Caspar screamed. The roll of thunder that followed seconds later drowned out most of it, but someone must have heard because they were calling his name, their voice getting more strained as rain started to fall. 

'Ashe,' said Caspar. He wasn't bad with directions and had no problem orienting himself inside labyrinthine palaces or dungeons--a childhood spent running around Fort Merceus helped--but at that moment he ran towards the sound of the person's voice without making sure where it was coming from or whom it belonged to. 'Ashe!' 

'Caspar!' Ashe popped out from a clump of blackthorn; trailing leaves and sporting scratches all over his face. When he got close enough, Caspar noticed his eyes showed too much white. 'Are you okay?' 

'Yes,' said Caspar. 'No. I don't--the lightning--' 

'There's a boathouse by the lake,' said Ashe, grabbing Caspar's hand and pulling him close. 'We can take shelter there.' 

Caspar nodded. And because he knew Ashe wouldn't say anything or tease, he pressed close, letting Ashe hold him. They were both getting soaked, the thick canopy of leaves not enough against the pouring rain, but they stood there as Ashe rubbed Caspar's back and Caspar's breathing slowed back down to normal. 

'Thunderstorms are pretty rare in this area of Faerghus and they don't last long,' said Ashe. He didn't raise his voice to be heard over the rain and occasional thunder, pressing his lips close to Caspar's ear instead, his breath warm and even. 'But the rain certainly lasts. We need to find shelter or we'll catch our death of cold.' 

Caspar nodded. 'Let's go.' 

Ashe held on to Caspar's hand, giving it a squeeze every time lightning struck. In Caspar's mind they took hours to reach the boathouse, but the place was actually no more than a kilometre away. 

'Hold on,' said Ashe, finally letting Caspar go as he fiddled with the chains and lock that held the door closed. 

'You don't have the keys?' said Caspar. 

'I didn't think we'd need them.' Ashe took out a small roll of leather from his jacket and selected what looked to be a bent pin from the number of bent pins tucked inside. 'It's all right.' 

Caspar watched as Ashe jiggled the lock open, the process taking no more than a minute and Ashe acting like he was doing nothing more than pull out a book from the shelf. 'Ashe--' 

'Yes,' said Ashe. 'I used to be a thief. Lord Lonato caught me stealing from his study, but instead of turning me in he taught me how to read.' 

'Oh,' said Caspar, remembering his conversation with Ashe about the monastery thief years ago. 

'So.' Ashe crossed his arms and raised his eyebrow at Caspar. 'Do you feel the need to strike me down as we speak?' 

There were certainly things Caspar wanted to do, but striking Ashe down wasn't one of them. 'I want to have lunch,' said Caspar. He laughed when Ashe's frown deepened. 'Did you really expect me to kill you for that?' 

'Isn't that what your code of justice dictates?' 

'I've never really thought about it,' said Caspar. Ashe looked like he was ready to talk it out in the rain instead of taking shelter like a reasonable human being, so Caspar grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him inside the boathouse. 'I always reckoned I can cross difficult bridges when I come to them.' 

Ashe opened his mouth, sighed, and shook his head. 'Of course.' 

'But for now,' said Caspar, pulling out the bundles of food from his bag, 'it's time for lunch.'

*

Caspar disliked fish sandwiches--the pike was pickled before it ever saw a loaf of bread--but he managed to eat at least two before finishing off the rest of Bridget's roasted pheasant.

'I keep telling Marlena to stop making them,' said Ashe, who didn't quite manage to hide his enjoyment of the sandwiches in question. 

'You and Daley like them, don't you?' Caspar shrugged. 'I don't mind them, so long as there are other things to eat.' 

What Caspar cared about was the cold; they'd stripped down to their underclothes and did what they could to dry themselves, but they were also in autumnal Faerghus and Caspar was starting to feel it. 'I wish Annette was here. She could get a fire started with magic, don't you think?' 

'With us in our small clothes?' said Ashe, laughing. 

'The professor, then.' Caspar pressed closer against Ashe in an attempt to share body heat. 'Did the professor know you used to be a thief?' 

Ashe licked fish juice from his fingers and nodded. 'Not many people do, but I thought--' his voice trailed off. Caspar knew exactly what he meant; Eisner didn't judge, which was why he'd been so easy to talk to. 

'What about the people from the keep?' 

'I've had run-ins with some of them, so yes they knew,’ said Ashe. 'I'd always be grateful to those who accepted me when I came back, even if I--' 

Ashe had killed many of the militia during the rebellion in Gaspard. He might even have faced Lonato on the battlefield. 

'A former thief and an exile from the Empire,' said Caspar. 'We're certainly giving the villagers something to talk about.' 

Caspar felt more than heard Ashe laugh, soft sound that was almost a sigh, and Caspar wondered but didn’t dare look at Ashe’s face. Instead he looked through the cracks in the walls of the boathouse, wondering when the rain would stop. 

*


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caspar reunites with the Blue Lions at Garreg Mach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey they're back. 😎
> 
> There's no reason for Caspar to call people by their surnames here, tbh. Even in Japanese, everyone calls each other by name--barring the house leaders, who are called by their titles in the War phase (and even then, there's Claude). I also didn't pay particular mind to the honorifics. Basically that's just stylistic choice because lords are more likely to call each other by their titles and holdings than by their actual names.

The journey back to Garreg Mach had taken longer than Caspar expected. Night had fallen by the time they'd reached the monastery gates; the place that had been their home for a year looked both strange and familiar in the flickering light of the torch Ashe held in his hands.

'Where is everyone?' said Ashe, his voice hushed as he looked around. 

'No farther than the entrance hall, I hope,' said Caspar. 'I hear a group of thieves had taken over this place.' 

Ashe placed a hand on the remains of a stone wall, fingers tracing the pattern of leaves that had been carved on it. 'Do you remember when we got caught up in a skirmish with brigands and Mook got hurt badly?' 

'I had to leave you here with Mook while I fetched Linhardt,' said Caspar. 'He was having none of it though and I had to carry him down.' 

Talking about the past helped dispel the emptiness that seemed to resonate within the monastery, the silence unbroken even by crickets, and their voices summoned memories of what Garreg Mach had been before it fell. Caspar moved farther inside, sliding his feet across the floor to minimise the chances of stumbling over debris or twisting his ankle, and he'd been so focused on his footing he almost missed the pale figure moving next to the monastery gates. 

'Ashe,' he said, waving Ashe over. 'Can you see what I'm seeing?' 

'That's not funny,' said Ashe, clutching at Caspar's arm. But because he was Ashe, his inquiring mind won over his fear and he adjusted the torch light to get a better look at the figure. 'Caspar, I think it's the professor.' 

'That's not funny either.' Caspar took a step back, wondering if Eisner had come back to haunt the place where he'd died. 'You said ghosts don't exist.' 

But Ashe was right; the way the figure moved, its pale hair that seemed to glow in the dark--Caspar could swear it was Byleth Eisner in the flesh. 

'He's not alone,' said Ashe. 

They had failed to see him at first because his dark armour blended into the shadows, but standing near Eisner was a tall man with golden hair.

'Macuil's balls,' said Caspar. 'It's Blaiddyd.' 

*

Caspar hadn't expected his class reunion to include such activities like getting rid of a gang of thieves--from the way his father talked, Caspar had expected more food and drinks and nostalgia. But they were living in interesting times and rounding up a bunch of rogues sounded better than eating cold food in the dark. He and Ashe gladly joined the fray when it became obvious Blaiddyd was planning on facing a group of armed men with only Eisner by his side. 

'Is he out of his mind?' said Ashe, putting out his torch so as not to alert the thieves to their presence. 'How are they even both alive? I thought the prince was executed for killing the Regent.' 

'Beats me,' said Caspar. 'But the professor is out there and that's good enough for me.' 

Ashe sighed, but followed Caspar anyway. Blaiddyd might have a death wish, but there was no reason Eisner had to go down with him. They sneaked closer to the gates, Ashe still holding Caspar's arm as if to make sure he didn't rush into battle--Caspar let him because Ashe had better eyesight and Caspar didn't want to break his neck falling into a pit. 

When the nearest enemy was just a throw of an axe away, Ashe let go of Caspar and slid into the shadows. Caspar yelled as he swung his axe, shifting his weight to bear the impact of metal against armour and flesh. From the corner of his eye he saw the flashing glint of Ashe's arrow before he heard one of the thieves cry out. Ashe was perfectly capable of going solo, but Caspar was more than happy to draw the enemies' attention to himself while Ashe picked them off from behind. 

'Thank you,' said Eisner. He looked happy to see his former students--or as happy as his Ashen Demon face could look with them still outnumbered ten to one.

'Hey, professor,' said Caspar, eyeing the unprotected bits of flesh in front of him. The gang must be getting cocky after holding undisputed control over the monastery ruins for a couple years. 'I think I'm taller than you now.' 

'Not a chance.' The smile on Eisner's face vanished when they heard Blaiddyd's grunt of pain. Eisner threw a handful of magical fire at his opponent without checking if it hit its target, rushing to where Blaiddyd stood clutching his arm. 

'Ah,' said Ashe. 

'Poisoned,' said Blaiddyd, his mouth a grim line as he pulled the broken shaft of the arrow from his arm. Caspar was too far away to be sure, but the arrowhead looked to be leaf shaped and thankfully not barbed. Blaiddyd's armour hid most of the blood, but some of it had gotten on the fur that was draped over his shoulders. 

'Saint Cethleann,' said Ashe. 

'It's fine.' Blaiddyd tried shaking Eisner off, but Eisner managed to hold him back long enough to cast a healing spell. 

'I wish Mercedes were here,' said Eisner, ignoring Blaiddyd's glare. 'But this will have to do for now.' 

'Come on,' said Ashe. 'We need to distract those thieves away from the professor.' 

Caspar hurried after Ashe, yelling some more and feeling the familiar rush of excitement as a rogue swung a sword at him. Blaiddyd and Eisner coming back from the dead would change the chain of command in both Faerghus and the Knights of Seiros, but Caspar was going to worry about those implications later. For now, he had a battle to fight. 

*

One by one, Caspar's former classmates arrived at Garreg Mach and helped round up the remaining thieves in time for dinner. Caspar and Ashe had bought sandwiches and grilled meat from an inn in Magdred, which they added to the pile of food the others had brought. Provisions were easy enough to come by, but there was also the question of accommodation. 

Fortunately, Pallardó and his men had left the Academy and its dormitories intact, having done most of their looting in the cathedral. 

With all of that settled, everyone gathered around Blaiddyd, with Eisner standing just behind him, and Caspar was about to ask the prince what the hell his problem was when Ashe stepped on his foot. 'Hey.' 

'What are you doing here?' said Blaiddyd. 

'Did you forget? We promised to meet here for the Millennium Festival, didn't we?' said Ashe. 

'And you were the one who suggested it, too,' said Mercedes, placing a hand on her cheek.

'There were rumours about Imperial soldiers getting killed hor--' Gilbert caught himself and Caspar wondered if Eisner would step on _his_ foot, '--by a mysterious person. I didn't dare hope, but I followed the rumours here and found you, your Highness.' 

'Don't call me that,' said Blaiddyd. 'A corpse deserves no title.' 

'Dimitri.' Eisner's voice was sharp, like he was reprimanding Blaiddyd in class, but the uncertainty in his face reminded Caspar how Eisner was really not much older than his students. 'Why would you say that?' 

'The dead have claimed me, that's all.' 

'That was indeed what we thought,' said Gilbert. 'Forgive me, Your Highness, but the security of the prison in Fhirdiad is quite robust--' 

'Dedue helped me,' said Dimitri. This time, he didn’t brush Eisner off when Eisner laid a hand on his arm. 'He took my place.'

'And we shall honour his sacrifice,' said Gilbert, after a moment of silence where everyone tried to process what Blaiddyd had said. 

Gilbert was still talking, but Caspar had stopped paying attention. 'Are you all right?' he said, leaning against Ashe. 

'I can't believe Dedue is gone,' said Ashe, softly.

There was something to be said about chivalry and the honour upheld by the knights of Faerghus, but what good were pretty words at the face of death? Honouring Dedue's sacrifice did nothing, much less comfort a man who looked like he had a foot on the grave himself. That part of knighthood had never sat well with Caspar. 

‘Is that all everyone has to say?’ he said, trying to keep his voice down. 'Molinaro was a much better man than--’ he stopped when he felt a vicious pinch at his side. 

‘You better stop there, Caspar,’ said Linhardt. ‘We’ve committed enough treason in our lifetime.’ 

Tact wasn't Caspar's strong point and he was angry enough not to care about making this damned reunion even more awkward. He opened his mouth and then shut it closed when he heard the heavy footsteps of men in armour coming from the courtyard. A man's voice called out Eisner's name.

‘What do you know,’ said Gautier. ‘The Knights of Seiros are back.’ 

‘I wonder if they’ve found Lady Rhea,’ said Mercedes. 

'They wouldn't keep it a secret if they have,' said Gautier. 'There's more to be gained by telling everyone we have the Archbishop on our side.'

'It will certainly help with morale,' said Galatea. 'People like rallying around figureheads, don't they?' 

Fraldarius glared in Dimitri's direction. 'And this is what we have.' 

Caspar sighed. At least Eisner was back. 

*

Caspar rested his forehead on Ashe's shoulder, wondering if he should stab himself with one of Ashe's arrows to keep awake. Next to him, Linhardt had given up all pretense of caring and was slumped sleeping on the table. 

Battles were won by logistics as well as manpower and skill; Caspar knew as much, but it was certainly the more boring aspect of war. Seteth and Gilbert were discussing the advantages of having Garreg Mach as a base for operations, with Eisner and Blaiddyd throwing in their two cents. Not that Blaiddyd seemed interested in anything that didn't involve killing Edelgard. If Caspar hadn't been dead tired, he would have found the whole situation funny. 

'What do you think, professor?' said Seteth. 

'I think everyone needs to get some rest,' said Eisner, looking around the dining hall. 'This can wait.' 

Everyone awake turned to look at Blaiddyd, who just shrugged. 'Do what you will.' 

Taking that as a dismissal, everyone filed out of the room. Caspar had to shake Linhardt awake, but at least the meeting was over. 

'Linhardt, Caspar,' said Eisner, before Caspar could reach the exit. 'A moment, please.'

Caspar turned to Ashe. 'Do you need me?' 

Ashe took a moment before replying, which made Caspar happier than he cared to admit. 'I'm fine. I just need to think about a few things.' 

'All right,' said Caspar. 'See you.' 

'Don't wake me up before the sun rises,' said Ashe. But his smile was looking less forced and he bumped his shoulder against Caspar's before heading to his room. 

'What was that about?' said Linhardt. 

'Well, Dedue was a close friend of Ashe's, wasn't he?' said Caspar. 'Of course Ashe feels horrible right now.' 

'I didn't know you and Ashe were close,' said the professor. 

'I travelled Kingdom and Alliance territories for a while,' said Caspar. 'But I've been staying in Gaspard the last few moons.' 

Eisner nodded. 'You're both asleep on your feet so I'll keep it short: you don't have to join our forces just because you joined the Blue Lion house. Both your fathers support Edelgard, don't they?' 

'I cut ties with the House Bergliez five years ago,' said Caspar. 'I still wouldn't want to face my father on the battlefield, but you were right, professor. I decided to make my own path.' 

'Good man.' The professor turned to Linhardt. 'Unlike Caspar, you're the heir to the House Hevring. I don't want you to feel obligated to stay.' 

'I have been thinking about it,' said Linhardt. 'But I want to know more about you, professor. You've been asleep for the last five years, haven't you? I'm envious myself, but one has to wonder how that could be possible. Your appearance hasn't changed at all; you'd think your hair would grow longer, at least.' 

Caspar rolled his eyes. 'Not this again.' 

'And I thought I needed to keep an eye on Caspar,' Linhardt went on as if Caspar had said nothing. 'But it appears I'll have more time to nap in the future.' 

'What's that mean?' said Caspar, but Linhardt just laughed. 'Professor?' 

'Good night,' said Eisner, hiding a yawn behind one hand. 'Get some rest; we're all going to need it for tomorrow.'

'Oh good,' said Caspar. 'More meetings.' 

His room was on the second floor, as was fitting for a noble--at least that's what he'd heard his peers say. Linhardt hadn't bothered with propriety and was spared having to go up the dusty stairs with nothing but moonlight to guide his way. Caspar wished he'd done the same.

In the darkness of his noble room, Caspar sank into his musty noble bed. As far as homecomings went, this one was probably up there with the bleakest in Garreg Mach history. 

*


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caspar and Ashe talk about what they're fighting for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing about war is hard. I've been reading Ginn Hale's _Champion of the Scarlet Wolf_ novels while writing this chapter (and the next), and that serves as my inspiration for everything, really.

Caspar waited until the sun had cleared the horizon before barging into Ashe's room. The Imperial invasion had happened so quickly those who had chosen to stay and fight had been left little time to do anything but leave the monastery when it fell. In Eisner's absence, Blaiddyd had led the Blue Lions to Charon, where they'd camped a few days waiting for news before heading their separate ways.

The monastery had remained empty until Pallardò and his men set up camp there, which meant the Academy dormitories looked just as it did five years ago, barring the layers of dust and abandoned spider webs. There was a comfort in this familiarity, as if the place had been waiting for their return, but more importantly: there had been no reason for Caspar to visit Ashe in his room during their Academy days and he was curious to see what it was like compared to Ashe's room in Gaspard.

Ashe had the same book-hoarding habits as Linhardt and his room was only a few piles away from being a mess, especially without Bridget to help tidy it up. He didn't leave books on the floor, but they were on every other flat surface that wasn't his bed. On the bedside table, a plate of colourful wrappers that once held sweets balanced on top of a pile of war treatises. Caspar pushed the plate into a less precarious position and hoped this wouldn't upset the mysterious system of Ashe's rubbish. 

'Were you watching me sleep?' said Ashe, peeping out of his pile of quilts. He sounded more amused than angry, which was reassuring, but Caspar felt guilty anyway. 

'I was trying to look for you in all this mess,' he said. 

'What for?' Ashe's voice dropped to a mumble and he pulled the quilts back over his head. 

'Training!' said Caspar. 'We're going to the training grounds and then the sauna!' 

'I swear in Saint Indech's name, Caspar,' said Ashe. 'If you drag me outside this room--' 

'A hearty breakfast and exercise are just what you need in times like this.' 

Neither of them heard the knock at the door because Caspar was too busy trying to pull the blankets away from Ashe, who was holding on for dear life. 

'Am I interrupting something?' said Eisner. 

'Professor,' said Ashe, sitting up. He let go of the quilt as he did, which sent Caspar flying. He would have cracked his head open against Ashe's desk if Eisner hadn't caught him. 'Caspar!' 

Caspar grinned at Ashe, who had jumped out of the bed to help him. 'Finally got you out of bed.' 

Ashe looked at Caspar blankly for a moment, and Caspar could hear the conflicting emotions in Ashe's voice when he said again, 'Caspar.' 

'I'll come back la--' 

'Don't leave on my account, professor.' Caspar stood up and brushed dust off the seat of his pants. He turned to Ashe. 'I'll meet you in the dining hall later.' 

Eisner placed a hand on Caspar's shoulder. 'Caspar mentioned he spent several moons with you in Gaspard.'

'Hey,' said Caspar. 'Are people really saying I tried to seduce him?' 

Eisner tilted his head to one side. 'Did you?' 

'Caspar,' said Ashe. Third time was a charm; Caspar took note to behave before Ashe really lost his temper.

'For the record, I didn't,' said Caspar, at the same time Ashe said, 'Yes, we came here from Gaspard.'

'I talked to him and Linhardt last night, but I didn't think to consult with you.' Eisner shook his head. 'I don't expect you to join our forces if there'll be a conflict of interests. I know Gaspard can't afford to go against Rowe.' 

Eisner was right, but Caspar didn't like how he talked like Ashe and the people of Gaspard hadn't been doing their best just keeping the town from crumbling under the weight of the Dukedom's taxes and Cornelia's ill-considered policies. 

'Towns are made up of people, you know, professor.' Caspar felt Ashe pinch his arm, but he pretended not to notice.

'My point stands,' said Eisner. He'd let go of Caspar's shoulder and ran a hand through his hair. 'But you're right. That's something _I_ can't afford to forget, not with Dimitri the way he is.' 

Caspar had seen Eisner get angry with Blaiddyd only once before: the prince had been pushing himself too hard and Molinaro had finally asked Eisner to intervene. Blaiddyd had waved their worries aside and for a moment Caspar--who'd been watching the group from the other side of the training grounds--had thought Eisner was going to box Blaiddyd's ears and drag him back to his room. 

Instead, Eisner had pulled himself to his full height (sadly still a few centimetres short of Blaiddyd's) and said, 'Very well, Your Highness.' 

'I'm sorry,' said Caspar. 'You've got enough on your plate as it is.' 

'I'd be a poor professor if I don't listen to what you have to say.' The shadow of a smile passed over Eisner's face. 'But I'm not your professor any more, am I?'

'Then,' said Ashe. Caspar hadn't noticed Ashe had been holding him until he felt Ashe's grip tighten around his arm. 'Then, do you mind if I ask you a question?' 

'Is it about Lord Lonato?' Eisner hadn't changed much; he'd become more expressive, but reactions were still more subtle than the average person's. Caspar wouldn't normally notice small gestures, but he'd been watching out for them: Eisner had moved as if to give Ashe a pat on the back and he frowned slightly as he reconsidered the gesture.

Ashe looked at his feet. 'Do you think Edelgard is wrong, professor?' 

Caspar had also been expecting a question about Lonato. He frowned at Ashe, who was refusing to meet anyone's eyes. 

'No.' Eisner leaned against Ashe's desk. 'At least, I don't think what she's fighting for is wrong.'

'Then why are you here?' said Ashe. 

'I want to find Lady Rhea,' said the professor. He hesitated before adding, 'And I won't leave Dimitri alone.' 

'Sounds like you don't believe in what _we_ are fighting for,' said Caspar. Disappointment struck like a knife in his gut, sharp and twisting at the realisation that the man he looked up to cared more for the prince's ass than the lives of innocent people. He could almost hear the blood rushing through his ears and only Ashe's grip on his arm stopped him from punching Eisner's pretty face. 'Don't you care for that at all?' 

'Do I?' Eisner sighed. 'Do you think Lonato cared about those peasants who died for his beliefs? What about the people the Emperor sacrificed for her cause?' 

'You mean there's no right answer,' said Ashe. 

'Or they think they've found it and are willing to pay the price.' Eisner stood up. 'You have responsibility to Gaspard, and maybe that means you need to stand against your friends. I can't presume to tell you what's right.' 

'You're not allying with the Empire, are you?' said Caspar. There was an absurdity in the situation that Caspar would have found funny--Ashe allying with the country Caspar had left--but the thought of finding Ashe on the other side of the battlefield terrified Caspar more than seeing his own father there. 

Ashe was silent for so long Caspar had to brace himself for the worst; it seemed to be a morning for betrayals. 

'No,' said Ashe, his lips barely moving as he spoke, 'I'm staying.' 

'Thank you,' said Eisner. 'Both of you.' 

Caspar watched him leave, waited until he'd closed the door behind him, before turning back to Ashe. 'Are you all right?' 

Ashe finally let go of Caspar's arm, moving away so he could sit back on the bed. 'I've been thinking about it, ever since Lord Rowe made his support of the Empire public. The Emperor is challenging the church, isn't she? It's what Lord Lonato wanted.'

'Seiros damn Lonato,' said Caspar. He knew the old man had been a good adoptive father to Ashe, but that didn't mean he had no flaws. 'I can't say the Church is trustworthy, and I'm not religious to begin with, but I don't see how they did wrong by him.' 

'How can you say that? They killed my older brother--' 

'Who supported the people that killed their king. All because he was hanging out with folks they didn't like,' Caspar cut in. 

'The Church had no solid proof Cristophe was connected to the tragedy in Duscur.' Ashe's voice rose. He couldn't look at Caspar in the face earlier, but he did so now, his pale eyes bright against his flushed face. 'But they killed him anyway.' 

Caspar was standing next to the bed and had to physically look down at Ashe, who was still sitting down. Any other time Caspar would think a man in an argument needed to stand tall and proud, but he could swear in Cichol's name he felt like Ashe was towering over him. 'But Catherine--' 

'Is too blinded by her devotion to Lady Rhea to think straight.' 

Caspar had never seen Ashe act like this before. Sharp and caustic and practically glowing in his anger; Caspar couldn't look away. 

'You see everything in black and white,' Ashe went on. 'And refuse to acknowledge anything you don't understand--'

'Ashe.' Caspar's voice broke and he swallowed before trying again, 'Ashe, I'm sorry.'

Ashe blinked, his mouth opening as if to say something, but he sighed instead and rubbed a hand across his face. 'No, I--that was uncalled for.'

'I deserve it.' Caspar laughed and sat on the bed next to Ashe. He felt Ashe lean against him, the weight familiar after the moons they'd spent with each other in Gaspard. Caspar sighed, closing his eyes as he realised he'd been tensing for a fight; his muscles taut and his heart pounding in his chest like a hammer against red-hot steel. 

'We used to fight like this five years ago,' said Ashe. 

'You were much more patient with me back then,' said Caspar, allowing his voice to betray just a hint of whine. 

'Was I?' Ashe laughed. From the corner of Caspar's eye he saw Ashe's head move, felt Ashe's cheek rub against his shoulder, and he tried very hard not to choke on air. 

Everyone had been fussing about him seducing Ashe, but here Caspar was, unable to breathe and utterly taken in. 

*

A temporary blind spot to the eagle eye of the conquering Empire, the monastery needed to be repaired and fortified before news of the army gathering there reached the Emperor. Everyone knew they didn't have the luxury of time, but there was almost an idyllic quality to their preparations; the Knights of Seiros and those from Faerghus that stayed loyal to their prince looked no more stressed than usual and Caspar even saw Linhardt join Annette and Mercedes for tea one afternoon. 

Blaiddyd did nothing to help bring Garreg Mach back into a semblance of what it had been, spending all his time in front of the altar ruins instead and refusing to speak to anyone. Rumour was he'd gone completely off his rocker, talking to people long dead and watching shadows. But even as deranged as he was, Blaiddyd's presence was still good for morale: after all, he was a Blaiddyd and everything else that came with the lineage. 

Brute strength wasn't all of it. The prince could lift a cart by himself and crush a grown man's skull in one hand, but even he wouldn't win against the sheer numbers of Adrestia, not to speak of the Emperor and her right hand man, who were both sharp as daggers and just as dangerous. 

The thing was, Blaiddyd had Eisner by his side and whatever Caspar felt about the both of them, he knew the Kingdom efforts would stand the chance of a snowflake in Ailell without them. 

'Not that I'm saying Fraldarius and Gautier haven't been pulling their weight.' 

'No, you're right.' Ashe sighed. They'd been picking up debris for most of the morning and loading them into a cart for clearing. There were streaks of dust and dirt on Ashe's face and Caspar reckoned he didn't look any cleaner himself. 'Our forces are strong, but under normal circumstances, I don't think we'd last long. With His Highness and the professor there however, the odds change.' 

'For the better?' said Caspar. He sat back and rolled his shoulders, wondering if it was time for lunch yet. 

'I can't say.' Ashe laughed. 'But they change.' 

'I'm glad you're on our side.' 

'Caspar--' Ashe checked himself and shook his head. 'After we left the Academy, I thought to follow Lord Lonato's footsteps. Yet here I am, allying with the Church he hated so much.' 

'It's for Gaspard, right?' said Caspar. 'We all have our reasons for being here.' He made a face and threw a small rock into the cart. 'I shouldn't have been so short with the professor yesterday. That's what he was trying to say, wasn't it?'

'I think so.' Ashe tried to hide a smile behind his hand. 'Not in so many words, but that's the professor for you.' 

'He's worried about Blaiddyd,' said Caspar, his tone making it sound like a question. 

'Well,' said Ashe. He clearly didn't want to talk badly of the prince, but Blaiddyd was doing his level best to make it hard not to. 'The professor _is_ first in the line of fire whenever His Highness is in one of his moods.'

'Which is all the time.' Caspar rolled his eyes. 

'Lunch is ready, guys.' Annette called out, waving as she hurried down the pathway to where Caspar and Ashe were sitting. She was carrying a basket filled with sweet buns and offered some to Caspar and Ashe. 'Mercie made these.' 

'Thanks, Annette,' said Ashe. 

Caspar had reached out for a bun, but Annette pulled the basket back. 

'Go wash your hands first. You're both filthy.' 

'It's just stone dust,' said Caspar. 'No one's ever died from a bit of dirt.' 

'I bet some of those stones have rat and bird droppings,' said Annette. 'Go wash up; I'll save you two buns each.' 

Caspar stood up and offered Ashe a hand. 'We're sharing rat dropping essence now.'

'Disgusting.' Ashe laughed. 'Come on, I'm starving.'

Caspar didn't let go of Ashe's hand and Ashe didn't pull away. Walking towards the well by the greenhouse, Caspar felt at peace.

*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 16 Jan 2021 - Hi it's me again. I'm done revising the old version of this fic and getting ready to move forward. Thanks for reading! 💙


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